10 Strategies for Taking Care of Yourself as a Black Womxn Dealing with Racism and Misogynoir
Photo by Angela Roma : https://www.pexels.com/photo/smiling-black-hairless-woman-lying-on-floor-7480138/
In light of all the racism and misogynoir struggles we encounter every day, from tv/movies, conversations with friends and family, scrolling on social media, and even hearing our own thoughts— Black womxn are constantly under strain.
While there has been some progress in the Black community as a whole, misogynoir still reigns and the reality is still present that our society has a disdain for Black womxn. From hotep podcasts telling womxn if they are “high value” enough to be “chosen” by someone errant son to “women’s movements” and “feminism” so focused on whiteness that they are just trying to get the same power to oppress as white men, it is tiring out here. But it’s more than that.
These constant ministrations of foolishness can gravely affect our self-esteem, self -concept, mental and sexual health, and thus our home and workplace performance. Not to mention that the more you “deviate” from lightness of skin, natural straightness of hair, heterosexulity, able-bodiedness, etc, you can experience more scrutiny and simultaneous erasure.
Despite all that we be out here thriving!
While there’s constant stress from patriarchy, the white supremacist delusion, etc., we can always make the radical move to take care of ourselves and preserve our mental health.
Here are 10 Strategies To Take Care of You
Validate what you’re feeling. Pay close attention to the feelings and thought patterns that affect you. Call the emotion by its name. Admit whether you’re angry, scared, or insecure. You’re human, and whatever your emotional response is to racism or misogynoir is always valid. If you need to cry or shout itout, do what you must. Acknowledge what you are feeling. By validating yourself, you also allow space to integrate what you’re feeling into what you know and can make conscious decisions on how to care for yourself.
Practice sensitivity of your trigger emotions. There will always be situations, words, or behaviors that will serve as the buttons to push and make these mental attacks explode.Awareness of triggers is only step one. Try to address potentially triggering situations proactively, or otherwise make a plan to take care of yourself. Because we know it’s not always possible to avoid every trigger.
Switch off or filter your social media. Social media is great but it can also be full of fuckery. Take control of your feed by curating your social media. In doing so you also gain control of what you allow to be fed into your mind and soul. Unfollow these social media posts that make you feel like shit. Or, hell, disconnect altogether! It may be for a day, a week, or however long you want, you only have to give yourself permission to do what you need to.
Read inspiring literature from Black women writers. Remember your mind is one of the most powerful parts of your being! Feed your mind with inspirational talks from Black womxn who know exactly what you’re dealing with. Their voices will comfort you in knowing that you’re not alone in this struggle, which can abate feelings of loneliness–and the shame that can come with it.
Play. That’s right. Get that booty in gear doing things that bring you pleasure! Take up skating, play tag with friends, eat food that make you dance. Play your favorite songs and twerk. Whatever brings you some fun and joy, do that!
Feed your face! Yall no I am not about to prothletize about healthy versus unhealthy food. After all, peanuts are healthy for some folk and deadly for others. Instead try eating intuitively. Ask your body what it wants and try to provide it. Eat a variety of foods that are great for YOUR body and your mental, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing.
Meditate… or journal your thoughts. Well, the point here is for you to simply spend time with you. Honor that “me” time because it helps you get aligned with your own thoughts and feelings. If you’re not into writing, then do something different all by yourself. I personally recommend masturbation as a way to get your mind focused on one thing and get some pleasure. Check out the 30 Day Masturbation Guide to help get you started!.
Get a hobby. Revisit your childhood and think about that one activity you always looked forward to doing. Was that watercolor-painting a sunset? Was that braiding hair? Was that styling/decorating your space? Knitting, running, reading??? Explore those activities now as an adult and see how rewarding it could be to do something you actually like.
Spend time with your family and friends. Nothing beats spending quality time with people you love and enjoy. There is a wide range of activities you can do or topics to talk about when you are with your people. Virtual or in person, connection can be centering.
Speak with a Black woman therapist
The mental duress resulting from racism and misogynoir is undeniable. Know that it is ALWAYS OK to seek professional help. Get a licensed therapist who is a good match for your specific mental health concerns. Black therapists could help you navigate the complex self-care steps that are best suited to your needs. Check out AnnodRight if you are in the DMV.
Remember that racism and misogynoir might be here for the long haul wreaking havoc and getting on your last nerve. Daily acts of self-care can help you to ill in your tank so that you can continue to be the badass you are navigating it all.
What are some other strategies you use to get back to center? Tell us below!
