Identity Crisis: A Guide to Finding Yourself and Living Your Best Life
While we still have a fuck ton of work to do, LGBTQIA+ folk have worked tirelessly to be heard, seen, and acknowledged. Today, we’ve expanded far beyond the original LGBT acronym to encompass new identities as many now have the language to better define themselves in a way they were previously unable to.
1. Labels are Optional
As LGBTQIA+ folk grow into themselves, it might become confusing to find which labels you feel are fully representative of you. And, while you’ll want to address others as their pronouns and be mindful of terms you use to describe them, you aren’t obligated to take on any of the labels for yourself at all. Plenty of LGBTQIA+ folk forgo labels altogether - probably because they want people to mind their own damn business.
Just because you don’t adhere to heternormative standards, it doesn’t mean you have to latch onto the nearest label. Terms like bisexual, pansexual, transgender, and other labels are forever changing and likewise, your label may change as time passes. Moving forward, there may still be more terms that come to fruition for people to more accurately identify with, though you don’t have to if you just flat out aren’t into labels.
2. Gauge Your Level of Safety
Coming out can be a huge relieving experience, but depending on where you live and who you live with, it may need a bit more tact. Whether to your friends or family, it’s best to know that you’re in a safe place when deciding to come out to someone. This can mean bringing up sexuality or gender in ways that keep you from being the subject. Examples could be mentioning an LGBTQIA+ friend or famous couple or possibly discussing LGBTQIA+ related laws and using their reactions to gauge how they might react to you coming out.
Know that if you aren’t out yet, that’s perfectly fine. If you feel that coming out would put you in harm’s way or if you simply feel like it’s no one’s business, coming out is never an obligation. You also don’t need to tell everyone in your life all at once either. How, when, and if you decide to come out is 100% in your control.
3. Find a Support System
If you’ve decided to come out to those closest to you and they’ve accepted you with open arms, those people can then become your support systems. Having support systems in place can make coming out an easier and safer process. Figuring out what kind of resources are available for your town for LGBTQIA+ folk can also make you feel safer in knowing that there are things in place to protect you.
In the end, all you can do is live life for yourself. Put on that makeup, wear those bright clothes, and be as loud and proud as you want to be. Be your authentic self filled with love, support, and confidence in who you are. You only have one life, so you might as well live it how you want.
