The Danger of the Paper Bag (Years Later)

In a late-January viral rant, R&B singer Keke Wyatt had a whole colorist fit. Like what the entire fuq! To spare you the whole sordid mess, here’s a summary: In a conversation that started about the allegedly stolen fried chicken recipes of some well-known franchises, she goes into this tangent that, as a biracial woman, she had it worse than darker-skinned women. The only “truth” of her whole tirade is that everyone had a struggle. Your color struggle may be different from mine - but the common denominator is that there is a struggle. This is not to drag Keke. The pure essence of her video appears to be a trauma response played out in public but we can’t get into the depths of that right now. 

As the continued foolishness of 2020 would have it, at the end of January we lost one of the most prominent faces who fought colorism, sexism, and racism in Hollywood, Cicely Tyson. Her life was the fight of the struggle and in some way many of us bore witness to it. Cicely left nothing unsaid or undone when she transitioned on. She was not quiet or silent about any of it. But here in February 2021, celebrating Black History Month, we still have light-skinned folk  arguing about the privilege they have because of their skin tones. We must do better. 

Not a secret in the history of this nation, that light-skinned Black folk in general have been privileged while those who are darker have not received the same treatments. As women, regardless of complexion, Black women were treated as property meant to warm beds, teach slavers children to have sex, to nurse white babies, to create more people who would be ensalved by way of rape from white people who owned Black people or from forced unions with fellow enslaved folks. The main difference here is that lighter skinned enslaved folk were more likely to be educated, taught a trade, and even set free because they were often the progeny of white enslavers. This is not to diminish suffering, everyone suffered. It is to bring to light that there is a difference between colorism based in oppressive structures and systems designed to uphold whiteness and white supremacy--while targeting darker skinned “obviously” Black folk, and color based prejudices based in hurt feelings.  

If we are going to share the horror stories, let’s do so in a way that is positive, beneficial, and moves towards a solution and end. Let’s talk about the things that have plagued us then. After everyone has cleared their hearts and minds, the conversation should and needs to shift to how to end this foolishness. We need to do the work to get ourselves together and heal within our families and communities. Be open to being confronted about the things you say that are divisive. Be open to correction. Be open to learn. Be open to history. Refresh yourself with the totality of Black History. Not just the highs and accomplishments. Look at the lows decide to become an agent change to address the things that started back then but still continue today. If you’re unsure where to start with that, check out Cocoa Butter and Hair Grease: A Self-Love Journey through Hair and Skin. It provides steps and actions to begin the healing process. Keep in mind, healing is not linear, nor a one-time event. There will be highs and lows and re-visits to topics that we thought we were over. We commit to this work so that we do not pass on the legacy of colorism, texturism, and racism from heart to heart and generation to generation. We learned the helplessness of the ‘isms.” It’s time to unlearn them and create new lessons.

For women on the outside of our melanated community, if you’re joining the conversation but your opening statement is anything along the lines of “I am not my ancestors …,” let’s pick a new starting point. That one will have you dismissed because the reality is that it was your ancestors, didn’t have to be you, but you have benefited from and (at best) passively upheld it. We are calling things out in this camp. Welcome to the party, here are your instructions. Check your internal compass first. Then start with just one of the corporate, societal, and/or institutional colorist, racist, or sexist practices that you see. This is the time when your actions and words must be aligned. No half-assing. We need wholehearted commitment to this work. Yes, it will require each and every one of us to do our respective parts. 

There are about 18 days left in this month. No time like the present to get things moving. What are you going to do? Let’s talk about it in the chat.